The future king of Canada? Prince Charles poses for a portrait to mark his 60th birthday, November 14, 2008.
HUGO BURNAND/AP FILE PHOTO
Allan Fotheringham - Finally. Finally. Finally.
At last. Next month we are going to have some help, in the visit of Prince Charles and his second wife, Camilla Parker Bowles, some useful aid in this strange little relationship with our head-of-state who lives in a castle across a large ocean.
Charles is not terribly interested in Canada – he has not been here for eight years. But I think it will, by its end, be maybe the most useful and educational experience in our decision with someone who apparently (supposedly) will become King of Canada.
In the 1980s, this scribbler was stationed for five years in Washington. It is, in fact, an artificial capital in that – unlike natural capitals such as London, Paris or Rome that represent their essential populace makeup – the majority of the population is black, far outnumbering the white folk who are the politicians, the government workers, the lobbyists.
I was determined to find the real Americans and set a goal for myself: to find over my five-year term all 50 of the American states. I almost succeeded, finding 47 of them, mostly by car.
The Americans are the most friendly people on Earth, all of them treating this stranger most graciously, until I revealed that I was from Canada. Somewhat puzzled, they backed off a bit, still gracious, but regarded me with somewhat of a different approach, knowing with some vague ignorance that we still had a connection with Mummy England.
This being natural, since the Excited States of America became the most powerful nation on Earth because of winning a war against their British colonial masters, some centuries back. They were polite, but they looked at me differently.
In 1981, I was in London to cover the marriage of Prince Charles to his much younger and beautiful bride. As luck would have it, my press seat in Westminster Abbey overlooked the altar and I could see, just 25 feet away below me, the mother of the groom. And I was astonished, throughout the whole ceremony, by the grim visage of Queen Elizabeth. Not the beaming, proud face that one would think be apparent on this joyous occasion of her son's marriage. But a joyless face without a smile throughout. In retrospect years later, it was easy to surmise that there was a premonition of something sad that was going to happen – and did.
The point I'm trying to make is that the visit of Prince Charles will be very valuable about Canada making up its mind about itself. We're not much into royal visits anymore. Especially since they don't come around very often (Camilla has never been to Canada) and in attempting to struggle out of a recession most of us have more important things on our mind.
Here we are, an advanced country, a member of the G8 and the G20, and still with this strange hook – unlike our fellow members – to another nation far away. They regard us with a mild puzzlement, as my American hosts viewed me three decades ago.
Governor-General Michaëlle Jean was accused a few weeks back of a major "gaffe" in referring to herself in a speech in far-off Paris as our head-of-state. The chaps who write editorials for the two "national" papers – the guys who would be unemployed if "should" and "must" were removed from the dictionary – went absolutely bananas over this, as if the death penalty were applied to jaywalkers.
I would suggest it wasn't such an accident at all; it may have been a hint to see how Canadians would react. The problem is that the editorial writers don't read the lowly sports pages. It turns out the constitution of the International Olympic Committee requires that every Olympic Games can be opened only by the head-of-state of the host country.
Queen Elizabeth, no doubt knowing the mobs of international photogs would demand a shot of her in a ski chairlift in Vancouver next February at the Winter Olympics, informed Ottawa some months back that she wouldn't be making the trip and asked our Gee-Gee to fill in for her.
The question arises: If Michaëlle Jean can be the host when all the nations of the world gather in Vancouver, why cannot she fill in the same role when the grandees of the G8 and the G20 convene in Ontario next summer for their annual meeting? Let's be consistent.
Prince Charles is going through a bad patch, looking more and more as the man-without-a-job. There is the troublesome glitch on this tour – ignoring completely Manitoba, Saskatchewan and Alberta – early polling showing there would be a disastrous lack of crowds there.
He is now 60. Good Queen Bess, a fine lady I have met several times, is 83 and in good health. The Queen Mum, we all remember, lasted to 101. The odds say that Charles will be well into his 70s before he inherits the job.
Let us suggest (i.e. predict) that the heir-to-the-throne will be surprised (i.e. astonished) at the muted reaction to his arrival here. Already his formal appearances are in the rent-a-crowd panic state to get bums in seats.
It's going to be embarrassing. In this new century, why does Canada just not grow up? Chop the goofy link.
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Allan Fotheringham is a veteran political columnist and author of eight books. drfoth@sympatico.ca